of the Genetic & Food Sensitivity Testing done this lovely wintery morning.
Let me first say that it's my personal philosophy to try - within reason- every diet, remedy, lifestyle suggestion, and test that I would ever suggest to my clients, friends, and family. What better way to empathize with a person on a candida cleanse? Or for the newly diagnosed celiac or gluten-intolerant person who is literally breaking down into tears over the thought of never being able to eat bread again? Sometimes what people really want to know most is that you've been where they are and have come out of it a better, healthier person.
I've recently embarked upon a journey to find out more than what I learned in high school biology about genetics, including Punnett squares (which, true to my curious personality, was tremendously fun to me - I even would use it to figure out the probability of having blue-eyed, red or dark-haired babies based on my genes and those of the person I was dating or currently crushing over, unbeknowst to them :D). Even though chemistry was like kryptonite to me and was one of the only subjects I actually had to focus on and study, I LOVED stoichiometry. Probably because it was math. (Nerd points scored by the end of this paragraph: 756).
But, getting back to the point: today I looked over the prettily packaged genetic kit (black box) and food sensitivity kit (red box) and decided that today is the day that I would gather my courage and forge into the unknown world of epigenetics and nutrigenomics ahead.
Because I couldn't eat or drink for at least an hour beforehand, I did my oil pulling when I first woke up and the started knitting and reading to pass the time. 10:45am rolled around and my alarm beeped so I followed the instructions for the food sensitivity test first. Wash hands vigorously in hot water for a few minutes, shake them, stand while doing blood draw, have a rubberband on arm to act as tourniquet, wipe finger with alcohol....breathe...and prick your chosen finger with the enclosed lancet - I did it all. As I stood there 'milking' my finger to get the blood into the first circle, I thought to myself "this isn't so bad, I'll be done in no time"...but two circles in, with a sore ring finger, I started to question why I was doing this. Suddenly, it didn't seem so important to find out if dairy, grapefruit, soy, or nearly another hundred foods were my friend or my foe. But then I thought of my clients who are excited to see my results and try for themselves....I thought of my future health being better once I could determine if there were underlying intolerances....so I put on my big girl pants and pricked another finger. I was damn well going to find out if my favorite foods were poisoning me or not. What seemed like an impossible task to start became a challenge. And, I filled them all. The blood-letting was done!
One small blood draw from woman, one giant leap for humankind.
Yes!! I could stand and not faint at the sight of my own blood. I Could
squeeze 12 precious drops of my life force in to the 5 circles and fill
them up. Yeehaw!
I was a hero in my own mind. The invisible stadium full of fans cheered for minutes as I held my newly bandaged fingers up in the victory sign.
Ah, but there is one more test standing between me and my breakfast.....
The cheek-swabbing! Thank goodness we were on to more humane methods of testing. With two cheek scrapers and two test tubes, I was off on a minute-long scraping mission on each cheek, with the scraper ends deposited into the test tubes. This is the genetic testing part. All I had to do now was stick everything into the postage-paid envelopes and deposit them in the mailbox. And eat....
The wait time is about 4-6 weeks for results. Stay tuned....
Interested in doing this yourself? Check OneBiteWellness.com under Rates & Services or contact me.